{First, a little backstory.}
The above memory showed up on Facebook today.
I can remember this day and the days surrounding it so well.
On Thursday the third, I received a phone call from Africa Inland Mission's USA office. The call came at the end of my work day. I had watched my phone all week. My coworkers were supportive in this and helped me to be able to go to a back room for when the call came. Then, an unavoidable task came and all of us were busy. I missed the call.
But, there was a voicemail.
Even now as I write this, I can feel the nerves return as I remember the anticipation of listening to that voicemail.
It was as I had hoped and dreamed.
I was accepted into AIM and I could now work with them to find an assignment. The trick was that Friday was a holiday and then it was a weekend. I had to wait THREE MORE DAYS until I could hear what options there were. After all the steps, loops, jumps, leaps, waiting, and everything else, three days sounded so short.
On Monday, 7 July 2014 I spent some time on the phone with someone from AIM and talked about what the options were.
The next day is when that Facebook post happened.
I was elated with joy.
I was full of excitement.
I was speechless with anticipation.
I was busy packing because the next day I was going to Africa with 8 other people for two weeks.
I was scatter-brained as I dreamt about what the future would hold.
I was eager to soak up each moment with family and friends before I left.
I was dreading the paperwork side of the endeavor.
I was trying to seek counsel to make a big decision.
I was celebrating with others that this was happening. (We ate pie.)
Possibly most of all:
I was absolutely clueless about the adventures and challenges, celebrations and disappointments, joy and pain, as well as the complete unexpected that lay before me.
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To the person I was two years ago-
Greetings from yourself!
Practice this. Properly greeting others is about to become an important part of your life.
First, I want you to know that you should cherish this feeling you have now.
The feeling that what you want to do and what God is leading you to do is merging into one reality. You WILL question your decisions in the next two years. ALWAYS, remember that God has put you where you are for a reason. Sometimes (maybe most times) you won't know that reason.
Adventures:
The adventures you go on will be things that you can't even comprehend right now.
-You will spend time in a national park observing magnificent animals in both Tanzania and Uganda. People call this going on a safari. I know you think this is something for National Geographic or professional explorers. But, this is something that you get to do and enjoy!
-You will travel over Africa by bus, sometimes with friends and sometimes alone. It will be a little crazy. But for some reason when it's over, you feel quite accomplished. One of these trips will involve sitting next to an elderly lady who has obviously had limited experience with motorized vehicles. When the bus company announces that everyone must put their seat belt on, she will look to you with confusion. Through limited language and mainly demonstration you get to teach this lady how to put on a seat belt. This task that is second nature to young children in America is so foreign to her and it will provide a unique bond for a few hours. This bond will grow when she looks to you with panic in her eyes as she tries to escape the seat belt and can't get it off.
Challenges:
Some daily events, some one time situations, some frequent occasions, some big horrendous multi-week battles..........there are many challenges that you will encounter in the next two years.
Know that each one will help to shape you, force you to grow in different areas of life, cause you to reach to new depths, become foundations for new friendships, and much more. [Yes, that sounds like an utterly useless long platitude but please accept it.]
Celebrations:
-After dreading the homestay with a family in the village with every ounce of your being, it will turn out to be a wonderful week full of so many experiences. You will go to the shamba (farm), carry firewood on your head, cook on a wood fire in the corner of a two room home, make bread in the same place, grind rice into flour, bond over basic things such as hunger, tiredness, sickness, and most importantly smiles and laughter. Remember to celebrate how one of your greatest fears turned into a one of a kind experience that you will want to last longer.
-One of your moves will put you in a situation that you will greatly desire to have a desk. You will quickly decide you would buy one and start asking essentially everyone if they know where to get a desk. Then, one friend will gift a desk and another will deliver it. Yes, that's right! God cares about something so small as providing a desk and chair.
-After over a year of moving every three months, you will get to move into your own flat just in time for your very first visitors to come in a few weeks. Yes, you will get to show people the place you call home. You will get to fully unpack for the very first time since leaving America. You will get to relish in how God provided in so many small ways so you can have a place to call home. Remember to celebrate that God cares about the small things and how He led you to a home with so many answers to the details you asked for.
Disappointments:
Your heart will break and even shatter a few times with disappointment. Small things that created the phrase "TIA" and big things that only God could have predicted will be the cause. It's not possible to avoid these events. God probably wants you to experience them so that you will learn to lean on Him. For in the next two years, you will learn that He is the only consistent part of your life. Friendships will be broken, trips to town will seem to be a waist of time, your immune system will fail consistently, language learning will challenge every ounce of your being......but you must continue. Don't ever give up. There is more to come.
Joy:
At times the joy will seem few and far between. Hold on and cherish the moments that joy consumes your whole being. It may come from a simple email, from a hid that gives you a hug as you walk up the little road to go home, from a friend that helps you when you didn't expect it, from seeing others loving you without even knowing you, from new friends that open their home to you and provide a sense of belonging, from chocolate milk, from finding a new song that so eloquently expresses the season of life........Remember the joy, for it will carry you through the pain and provide fuel to continue each and every day.
Pain:
You are going to experience pain in new ways and unfortunately in great ways.
-I do think you should know that towards the end of orientation, you will be sick. The physical pain will be at levels you didn't know were possible. Obviously, you will survive because how else would I be writing to you? It's ok to be scared and you will be scared. Your friends and some strangers will open their hearts and homes to you to comfort you emotionally and allow you to heal physically. Embrace them and lean on them through this time. That's all I'm going to say about this.
-You will experience the pain of being homesick. [Some days, you will miss certain people in extra ways and that will pass. Some days you will miss pizza from Castle Goddard, brussels sprouts from Catrina, special treats from Grandma's as Christmas, hugs from Sharon, gluten free adventures in the kitchen with Lydia, and even kettle chips just because they are so crunchy.] Then, around the one year mark you will struggle with no explanation. You will ache yet not have physical pain. You will want to cry often. Logic will kick in and you will realize that this is what homesick means. All of the small individual challenges turn into a mountain. You look back on the first year and think with certainty that there's no way you can do all of that again. The possibility of reliving some of those experiences makes you want to crumble to pieces. But guess what!! You don't have to do it again. At this point, things are different now. Even in the next six months as you might have some "similar" experiences, you can tackle them with confidence because of the ways you have grown and how certain aspects are vastly different.
Unexpected:
Simply put, things will happen that are unexpected (and at times, unwanted).
I'm not going to list any or describe the feelings and emotions that surrounded such events.
You are a planner and if you try to plan for these, then you wouldn't have the opportunities for growth that these events will allow.
If you were to know some of them, then you would stop in your tracks and never look back because I know you wouldn't want to deal with it.
But as I write this to you from 2016, know that you will survive.
Simply put, it is going to be ok.
And now......?
Are you wondering what life is like now?
Well, I put this on Facebook yesterday:
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| Caption at top: Hung my first picture tonight. I think this means I've made the switch from "a new place to stay to "a new place to call home" |
After I did this, I just stood there and looked at it for a moment to absorb the magnitude of the situation. It is in a perfect place to see from the moment I walk in the door and it puts a smile on my heart every time I see it.
Look at the bottom! ............. 56 people liked/loved that moment
And now look at the moment you are in! ............... 32 people liked that moment
In this small way, you can see that God has nearly doubled the friends, family, supporters, and other amazing people that are joining you for your journey.
I wonder what the coming months will bring before I'm back in the states again.
I wonder how I've survived this far.
I wonder what even tomorrow will bring.
I wonder how much more pain will be experienced.
I wonder what celebrations will come..
I wonder what will cause joy to overflow from my heart.
I wonder who will come into my life and start a new friendship.
I wonder who will leave my life and we will go in different directions.
I wonder where adventures will lead me.
I wonder.....
From yourself in 2016,
With amazement at how far you have come
gratefulness for people and experiences
growing love for people across Africa
and mostly hope that this is something to remind you that the road ahead is difficult but well worth the journey.
-Katherine
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