I am already constantly thinking about returning. Within 24 hours of getting back, I was looking up dates for future trips.
One of the reasons I knew this trip was the timing. For a few reasons, it fit perfectly into other things that were going on. Some might argue that travel can be done later in life. I have two issues with that. 1. Later in life there are families, jobs, comitments which make travel extremely more complicated. 2. This isn't "travel". As much fun and life changing as this was, it came with challenges and difficulties.
More and more each day, I am seeing how I am getting led toward a life very different from what the western culture has to offer. My heart is being pulled to other places.
However, I am torn. I feel like I should acquire skills or knowledge to be able to be as much help to the children as possible. That means more and more time away. So where do I draw the line? What is the line between going to be actively serving and preparing to serve in the best way possible?
Meanwhile, I want to go back. I want to visit. I want to spend more time and learn about the kids and the culture they live in. The debate is December. There is another trip in December. I am having a hard time thinking of reasons not to go.
Sunday, August 21, 2011
Initially
Some initial thoughts. . . .
Well the last five weeks have been a whirlwind of emotions. A summer of mission trips like I never imagined.
I was extremely blessed to be able to go back to two native villages in Alaska. My heart has been there for eight years now. My first trip to love on those kids was in 2003. This year, I returned yet again for over two weeks. We were able to do a VBS for the kids in each village. Sometimes, I think going on these trips blesses me more than it does those kids. It was been beyond what I could have imagined to watch some of the kids grow up over the years.
At the end of a previous trip, I remember having conflicting feelings about shopping before catching the flight home. We had just spent the week with kids that had holes in their shoes, wore the same clothes all week, and at age 5 were caring for their younger siblings while their parents were not around. How could I rationalize buying stuff to collect dust? I couldn't! The kids have a life full of abuse: sexual, physical, emotional, alcohol. It is hard to watch them get torn between coming to VBS and "connecting" with us even though they know we will be leaving in a few short days. They distance themselves toward the end of the week to make the goodbye's easier.
Then, just 6 days after this, my life changed forever by going on a trip to Ethiopia and Rwanda with Visiting Orphans. This trip was more than I could have ever expected. Actually, I'm not even sure I knew what to expect. I do admit that I felt like I wasn't as prepared as I could have been for Africa because my time was consumed in preparation and literally in Alaska.
First, let me say that there really is no great and wonderful way to have a tidy description of mission trip to Africa. It just isn't possible. But I will try my best to share a glimpse of my experiences.
With all the emotions still vividly running through me, it is hard to summarize everything. It is literally a whole different world over there. It almost frustrates me to come back and live with the never ending luxuries that we take for granted in the Western culture.
Something as simple as shoes. How many pairs of shoes do you have? How often do you wear each pair? How many pairs of shoes do you have that are same but you thought you "needed" them in different color schemes? I have too many shoes for myself, don't wear them enough to rationalize owning them, and have been guilty of getting the same in different colors. The kids that we were blessed to spend time with are lucky to have one pair of shoes. If they are luckier than some, they will match. If they are extremely lucky, the shoes will fit and not have any holes or broken parts.
The food that the kids get at the orphanages varies some but in general lacks many nutrients. Meat is a rarity on the dinner plate, making protein something that everyone lacks immensely. A loving human touch is something I fear the kids only experience when teams go to visit them as we did. When is the last time you hugged your children, friends, or spouse? or even held their hand? A number of kids won't recognize the language barrier, they are content to just hold your hand.
So many thoughts, emotions, feelings, and experiences are rolled into such a short time. I will continue to share as I process everything.
Well the last five weeks have been a whirlwind of emotions. A summer of mission trips like I never imagined.
I was extremely blessed to be able to go back to two native villages in Alaska. My heart has been there for eight years now. My first trip to love on those kids was in 2003. This year, I returned yet again for over two weeks. We were able to do a VBS for the kids in each village. Sometimes, I think going on these trips blesses me more than it does those kids. It was been beyond what I could have imagined to watch some of the kids grow up over the years.
At the end of a previous trip, I remember having conflicting feelings about shopping before catching the flight home. We had just spent the week with kids that had holes in their shoes, wore the same clothes all week, and at age 5 were caring for their younger siblings while their parents were not around. How could I rationalize buying stuff to collect dust? I couldn't! The kids have a life full of abuse: sexual, physical, emotional, alcohol. It is hard to watch them get torn between coming to VBS and "connecting" with us even though they know we will be leaving in a few short days. They distance themselves toward the end of the week to make the goodbye's easier.
Then, just 6 days after this, my life changed forever by going on a trip to Ethiopia and Rwanda with Visiting Orphans. This trip was more than I could have ever expected. Actually, I'm not even sure I knew what to expect. I do admit that I felt like I wasn't as prepared as I could have been for Africa because my time was consumed in preparation and literally in Alaska.
First, let me say that there really is no great and wonderful way to have a tidy description of mission trip to Africa. It just isn't possible. But I will try my best to share a glimpse of my experiences.
With all the emotions still vividly running through me, it is hard to summarize everything. It is literally a whole different world over there. It almost frustrates me to come back and live with the never ending luxuries that we take for granted in the Western culture.
Something as simple as shoes. How many pairs of shoes do you have? How often do you wear each pair? How many pairs of shoes do you have that are same but you thought you "needed" them in different color schemes? I have too many shoes for myself, don't wear them enough to rationalize owning them, and have been guilty of getting the same in different colors. The kids that we were blessed to spend time with are lucky to have one pair of shoes. If they are luckier than some, they will match. If they are extremely lucky, the shoes will fit and not have any holes or broken parts.
The food that the kids get at the orphanages varies some but in general lacks many nutrients. Meat is a rarity on the dinner plate, making protein something that everyone lacks immensely. A loving human touch is something I fear the kids only experience when teams go to visit them as we did. When is the last time you hugged your children, friends, or spouse? or even held their hand? A number of kids won't recognize the language barrier, they are content to just hold your hand.
So many thoughts, emotions, feelings, and experiences are rolled into such a short time. I will continue to share as I process everything.
Thursday, August 4, 2011
3 Days!
Roughly speaking I have been home for 3 days since the trip to Alaska. I am also leaving in just under 3 days for Africa. There are so many things to talk about and share with you! I know I won't get all of them.
Some brief things about Alaska:
It was great, wonderful, amazing, glorious, gorgeous and more! I was there for 18 days. Two weeks of a Vacation Bible School in two different native villages. Parts of it seemed more challenging than others and years past. It has been amazing to see the kids grow up over the years. The amazement on their faces, when you say their name, is great. They just can't fathom that this strange person already knows their name and gives them the time and attention that they never dreamed of. Some of the kids are old enough now that they are helping us and filling in the needs. Personally, I had some issue being gone so long. I wasn't totally homesick just friend-sick. Being gone that long made me realize how blessed I am with my own friends. I definitely came to the conclusion that missing people would be one of the hardest aspects of long term work.
Africa is creating mixed feelings right now. I still have some essential tasks to complete and of course the other things that I want to do before leaving again. The to-do list does cause me stress for sure! It seems that it is masking some excitement also. This week I have said out loud, "leave for Africa on Saturday". That has really started to have it hit home. Today, I came home and had a package. It was the hard copy of the tickets and itinerary. That was crazy and extremely exciting! Holding the tickets in had was definitely the most recent "wow, this is really happening!" moment.
I hope to share some more before departing but honestly right now, sleep is needed.
Blessings until next time!
Some brief things about Alaska:
It was great, wonderful, amazing, glorious, gorgeous and more! I was there for 18 days. Two weeks of a Vacation Bible School in two different native villages. Parts of it seemed more challenging than others and years past. It has been amazing to see the kids grow up over the years. The amazement on their faces, when you say their name, is great. They just can't fathom that this strange person already knows their name and gives them the time and attention that they never dreamed of. Some of the kids are old enough now that they are helping us and filling in the needs. Personally, I had some issue being gone so long. I wasn't totally homesick just friend-sick. Being gone that long made me realize how blessed I am with my own friends. I definitely came to the conclusion that missing people would be one of the hardest aspects of long term work.
Africa is creating mixed feelings right now. I still have some essential tasks to complete and of course the other things that I want to do before leaving again. The to-do list does cause me stress for sure! It seems that it is masking some excitement also. This week I have said out loud, "leave for Africa on Saturday". That has really started to have it hit home. Today, I came home and had a package. It was the hard copy of the tickets and itinerary. That was crazy and extremely exciting! Holding the tickets in had was definitely the most recent "wow, this is really happening!" moment.
I hope to share some more before departing but honestly right now, sleep is needed.
Blessings until next time!
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